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Suicide is preventable, or is it? The dark truth is that most of us are so self-absorbed that we miss all the signs. A person in my high school committed suicide. I dreaded writing about this for many reasons, mostly rehashing the pain and confusion most of us felt upon learning about it, and perhaps it may be inappropriate as I would be breaching the privacy of the parents and close friends where they are forced to relive that unfortunate event… For the sake of keeping this as private as I can, I’ll name her “X”. I was not friends with X, at least we weren’t close friends. I did not know her in a personal capacity apart from us being in the same science class for 2 consecutive years, in fact, the most you can say is that we were acquaintances. X was known as being a generally happy person, X had many friends and was well liked by her peers. No-one expected X to do this. It was over the weekend, I came back to school the following week and remember hearing it announced that she was in the hospital in critical condition, she subsequently passed away as the harm done wasn’t something that could be repaired. My school dealt with it like any other school would, we were all placed in the library where professionals came in and lectured us on suicide prevention, following which, psychologists came to our school and students who showed signs of distress were forced to meet with them. The school mourned for about two weeks until everyone moved on with their lives and forgot about it. The suicide prevention we were all passionate about went back to being something we made fun of others for. The girl who we knew used to cut her arms continued to hide it, she continued breaking school, sleeping through classes and eventually dropped out- no one has heard from her since; why wasn’t she helped? Why didn’t we do something? Mental disorders affect everyone. According to the North Central Regional Health Authority, 50% of mental disorders develop by the age of 14 and 75% by the age of 24, Ashvini Nath. According to the World Health Organisation statistics, almost one million people die from suicide yearly, a global mortality rate of 16 per 100,000, or one death every 40 seconds. In the last 45 years, suicide rates have increased by 60% worldwide. Suicide is among the three leading causes of death among those aged 15-44 in some countries, and the second leading cause of death in the 10-24 years age group. These figures do not include suicide attempts, which are up to 20 times more frequent than completed suicide. (www.who.int/mental_health) The site also says, “Although traditionally suicide rates have been highest among the male elderly, rates among young people have been increasing to such an extent that they are now the group at highest risk in a third of countries, in both developed and developing countries.” The plead is for us to become more educated, empathetic, compassionate and to abstain from being judgmental. Too often we bash those who have died due to suicide, subjecting their family and friends to uninformed and archaic thoughts and opinions. Here are some common misconceptions about suicide:
Here are some suicide warning signs, per helpguide.org: Talking about suicide – Any talk about suicide, dying, or self-harm, such as “I wish I hadn’t been born,” “If I see you again…” and “I’d be better off dead.” Seeking out lethal means – Seeking access to guns, pills, knives, razor blades or other objects that could be used in a suicide attempt. Preoccupation with death – Unusual focus on death, dying, or violence. Writing poems or stories about death. No hope for the future – Feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and being trapped (“There’s no way out”). Belief that things will never get better or change. Self-loathing, self-hatred – Feelings of worthlessness, guilt, shame, and self-hatred. Feeling like a burden (“Everyone would be better off without me”). Getting affairs in order – Making out a will. Giving away prized possessions. Making arrangements for family members. Saying goodbye – Unusual or unexpected visits or calls to family and friends. Saying goodbye to people as if they won’t be seen again. Withdrawing from others – Withdrawing from friends and family. Increasing social isolation. Desire to be left alone. Self-destructive behaviour – Increased alcohol or drug use, reckless driving, unsafe sex. Taking unnecessary risks as if they have a “death wish.” Sudden sense of calm – A sudden sense of calm and happiness after being extremely depressed can mean that the person has made a decision to attempt suicide. Risk factors for teenage suicide include:
What can we do? 1. Ask them if they are okay/suicidal Asking someone will not put the idea in their head, sometimes all it takes is initiating the conversation for them to open up to you and be honest about their emotions. 2. Stay and listen Most times, people in those situations simply want a friend who will listen to them. Do not be judgemental, do not give your opinion on how you think they should adjust their life or that they should “just be happy”. Do not make them feel bad for feeling how they feel. Just. Listen. 3. Speak up if you are worried! Do not promise to keep a keep a secret if you know someone is self-harming, in danger, or contemplating suicide. Sometimes speaking to someone and being their friend is not enough, they will need professional help from someone qualified to give it. Sometimes you may be required to contact someone without the suicidal person’s permission. I promise you that ‘temporarily’ losing a friend is more important than losing them forever, they will forgive you for helping! HOTLINES & APPS: You’re Not Alone | Suicide is Preventable- free app on Android and Apple Trinidad and Tobago Suicide Hotline: (868) 645 2800 Trinidad and Tobago Innovative Parenting Support: 664-1520 Rape Crisis Society of Trinidad and Tobago: 657-5355 National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800- 7283 (SAVE) ChildLine: 800-4321 |
AuthorKarina Samaroo Archives
September 2019
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